For our first post we have to do a Miley Cyrus meets the Pepper Spray Mace Cop at the VMA graphic designed by Leon Cortez. All work and no play makes Jack (and us) a dull boy. Plus someone had to make this graphic. Now how can we make this go viral?

The morning after MTV’s Video Music Awards spectacle, perhaps an American Idol summed it up best. Upon sampling the kudoscast, Kelly Clarkson tweeted: “2 words: #pitchystrippers.”

Yet for all of Lady Gaga‘s calling-card outrageousness, her show opener (including a costume change into a seashell bra/thong bikini) was demure when juxtaposed with Miley Cyrus‘ scantily clad writhing during a “We Can’t Stop/Blurred Lines/Give It 2 U” medley with Robin Thicke.

Over the course of the six-minute melange, TV’s fallen Disney queen thrust her tongue about 20 times, pointed you to her special place on at least nine occasions and engaged in multiple iterations of what we will politely call “a– play.”

If 20-year-old Miley had mimed the dismemberment of Hannah Montana and subsequent burying of parts in separate graves, and then did a lap dance atop each of the headstones, it would have been less off-putting.

What Britney did with the snake years ago on the VMAs? Positively quaint, by comparison. Hell, even Thicke’s controversial “Blurred Lines” video itself came away from this looking almost classy.